160 days until *~graduation~* and people always ask me what I’m gonna do, where I’m planning on living, working, brushing my teeth, buying stamps. People are nosy. So for anyone interested, here’s what I got. Excuse the caps. I had some coffee. Also I’m sick of having to make up something that appeals to capitalism’s road map for twenty-somethings, so if it feels like I’m yelling, I am, from the top of a snowy peak, from underneath my comforter….
“So what are you gonna do with that degree?”
WHAT AM I GONNA DO WITH MY DEGREE? MY PAPER WORTH $200,000 AND A MENTAL BREAKDOWN? OR TWO? YOU KNOW WHAT I’M GONNA DO WITH THAT DEGREE? I’M GONNA TACK IT TO THE WALL, FIND SOME DARTS AND GO AT IT. THAT’S WHAT I’M GOING TO DO WITH MY DEGREE.
NOW MY LIFE. THAT IS SERIOUS. MY LIFE IS ART IN PROCESS. AS PROCESS. I KNOW YOU ARE DISAPPOINTED WHEN I SAY THAT WHEN I GRADUATE, I AM GONNA DO THE SAME THINGS I DO NOW. I’M GONNA EAT AND SLEEP AND DREAM AND SPREAD THE GOSPEL OF PEACE. I’M GONNA BE HAPPY. AND SAD AND SCARED AND HOPEFUL AND DESPONDENT AND RINSE AND REPEAT.
WHEN I GRADUATE, I’M GONNA KEEP LEARNING. KEEP READING. KEEP GROWING. KEEP FALLING AND GETTING BACK UP. I’M GONNA SPEW HONESTY AND I’M GONNA GIVE THE WORLD AND ALL ITS PEOPLE AS MUCH LOVE AS I CAN HANDLE–EVEN MORE ON GOOD DAYS. I AM GOING TO STOP CHECKING BOXES AND START EXTRICATING MYSELF FROM THEM. I AM GOING TO ESTABLISH VALUES AND ABANDON THEM WHEN THEY’RE WRONG. I AM GOING TO DISSOLVE FEAR AND RESOLVE TO LIVE FOR LOVE AND FOR JUSTICE. WHEN I GRADUATE, I AM GOING TO KEEP ON BEING. OH, AND I AM GOING TO WRITE. AND WRITE. AND WRITE.
And to feed my inner angsty child and yours, some Third Eye Blind: